About

“You’ve found the leading light of destiny, burning in the ashes of your memory
You want to change the world
You’d resigned yourself to die a broken rebel
But that was looking backward
Now you’ve found the light”

— Marillion, from “Childhood’s End”. Lyric by Fish

Back in early 2015, I was diagnosed as having moderate depression and severe anxiety. I was having serious trouble coping with all the responsibilities that were thrown at me, and all the poisonous neuroses in my head weren’t making that any easier. Thanks to copious amounts of peer pressure piled on over the years, my head was always telling me who I should be, what I should be doing, how I should act and, at times, what I should believe. The rights and wrongs of the world were very strictly defined, and my self-esteem was paper-thin having been progressively torn apart with guilt over every simple mistake or failure.

But I got help. After a few months of talking therapy, mixed with a little CBT, I started to see the flip side of the coin, and I began to see my true self in the mirror rather than a man in a mask, and to view my values and behaviours in a far more positive light.

Although the therapy ended years ago, the process is still ongoing. As I ask questions of myself I never would have asked before, I go on-line and find a lot of answers; and I learn what I can do with them.

And so, this is me today:

  • I lean towards the left-libertarian on the political spectrum.
  • I believe in trans-inclusive feminism.
  • I believe in the greater good: equality, justice and fairness for all.
  • I am “religiously-neutral” – I follow no organised religion, but respect everyone who uses their faith positively.
  • I am somewhat politically-correct. I don’t intentionally offend specific individuals, and will always apologise if I do, but I take a rather laissez-faire approach to people in general.

 

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